Your First Christmas After Divorce

Your First Christmas After Divorce

By Elizabeth Cookson

Published: 19 Dec 2025

Divorce is said to be one of life’s most stressful events, particularly where child arrangements need to be agreed. Your first post-divorce Christmas is an opportunity for self-care and compassion – for yourself and your children.

Be Kind to Yourself

It’s easy for the festive season to become overwhelming; the pressure to find the ‘magic’ can be particularly daunting when you are going through something stressful. So, this Christmas, give yourself permission to rest and recuperate. Good sleep and gentle days are essential for your recovery. Reflect on how far you’ve come; you have survived 100% of your worst days and will be more resilient as a result. You can finally let your shoulders down, embrace your own space, and enjoy some peace.

Support Your Children

Children need reassurance and stability. Encourage them to settle into their new routines and enjoy time with both parents without negativity. Clear contact arrangements agreed in advance help reduce stress and allow everyone to enjoy the festivities. When children see cooperation between parents, it gives them confidence and comfort.

Make New Traditions

Embrace the things you love – music, drawing, hiking, baking – whatever brings you joy. Decorate your space and make it uniquely yours. If you have children, encourage them to join in, making the space they want in both of their homes. Hone in on the traditions that are most important to you, make mince pies, dance to music. Watch and listen to things that feed your soul, rather than detract from it. Encourage your children to enjoy their Christmas with your ex and use your free time to do what makes you happy.

Look Ahead

You will have your final orders – divorce, financial, and maybe child arrangements. Your life is now your own, and you should support your children in navigating their new relationship, space and time with each of their parents. Focus on building security and stability going forward. Reflect on your values and intentions and consider what your new chapter could look like. Practise gratitude, mindfulness, and let go of old resentments as you move into the New Year.

When the New Year comes (or even before if you want) make a To-Do List. Perhaps you need to:

• Speak to your Family Solicitor or a therapist to ensure you are supporting your children and your new child arrangements order.
• Organise a meeting with a financial adviser;
• Get advice about implementing your pension share, making sure you see it though.
• See your solicitor about making a new Will.
• Resolve to get your affairs in order so that you can focus on creating the life you and your children want and need.